"Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is - His good, pleasing and perfect will." Romans 12:2

   i've been thinking about the issue of God's will, knowing what He wants for my life etcetc, and He has given me quite a few interesting thoughts to mull over. today's youth message was on keeping my perspective on God, and at the end the speaker mentioned the above verse under his point of how we need to get our thought processes right, because thoughts lead to habits which lead to a person. and this verse kept replaying in my head, perhaps because it's a commonly-memorised verse, and also because recently i've been seeking God and asking Him what His will is, especially since i'm nearing certain crossroads in my life.

   God impressed upon me just now that God's will isn't some fiery thunderbolt from heaven which we've to accept mindlessly, but it is something that we can apply our mental processes to ("test and approve what God's will is"). we are allowed to check and go through it - and reject it if we do not want to obey it. since there's the element of human choice in it, what leads us to discerning God's will is the part that comes before, "but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then, you will be able to test and approve..." the conditional clause there indicates very clearly that God's will is not some far-off, obscure dream, but it is something which we can understand, if only our minds are aligned with God. it makes sense, because if our thoughts are continually filled with our personal aspirations and secular things, it is inevitable that God's "still, small voice", when filtered through all the things of this world, becomes lost and obscured.

   this week i've been spending a lot of time at home, and i've grown to understand my dog a lot more. watching her pad around the house and sleep in all her favourite corners, feeding her and studying with her on my lap... all these have helped me to know her moods better. similarly, i've learnt that a good way of knowing God's will is to just spend time with Him. sometimes i fall into this trap of praying "dear God please speak to me during QT today amen" then speedreading my passage for the day, praying a cursory prayer (usually for God to help me study better) and then rushing off to mug. and that leaves God with hardly enough time to tell me the things that are on His heart. so i'm now slowly trying to spend more time with God, to meditate on His Word, and just to know Him better, because i think i will then be more sensitive and able to discern what His thoughts are. 

   Over all the earth, You reign on high

   Every mountain stream, every sunset sky

   But my one request, Lord my only aim

   Is that You reign in me again

   *Lord reign in me, reign in Your power

   Over all my dreams, in my darkest hour

   'Cos You are the Lord of all I am

   So won't You reign in me again  

   Over every thought, over every word

   May my life reflect the beauty of my Lord

   'Cos You mean more to me than any earthly thing

   So won't You reign in me again